am i some kind of a BITCH??

This lately, too many things happen in my life, i can't stand and live it anymore, the one that i love, and the one that used to born me, feed me, and care about me calling me as BITCH!!, damn, it's really killing me...

last Wednesday, i had argument with her( about the place that my 2nd sis will further her study ), before i go to school, she slap me, for using the FUCK word to my 2rd sis, she said tht i should not use tht kind of word and it's a sin!! damn, i argue back, and tell her, my sis doesn't even show me a respect!! isn't tht a sin too!!
i ran and go upstairs, i can't hold my tears, and she follow me to the upstairs, she said "What's wrong with u Nurul!!" i remain silent but she saw my evil smile, she scolded me again" How could u smile, when i'm mad at u??!!" she slap me again...T__T ( I'm smiling coz i want to hide my tears)and then i'm quickly pickup my bag and go to school...

i cant hide my tears anymore, i keep crying at school, my other friends try to calm me down, my class teacher know about my problem, then she spread it to others teachers=__="

after back from school, my 4th sis tell me tht my mum checked my fon, and damn it!! she know about my relationship with my ex-bf Gary...and my mum want to check all my email or facebook, she's really going to far!!

But liyana already delete the pictures..soo i'm really glad about it..coz my mum wont find out anything..

this morning, i feel soo tired and lazy, dont want to go to school, but i still wake-up early, to avoid my parents from keep blabering at my ears...

suddenly my mum said something, she said that "Please don't ever think i don't know what had u did, u such a budak jahat( bad girl )" that words really killing me...how come my own flesh and blood called me using that such word!!



hahhaa, i do look like budak jahat sometime.who doesn't rite?

am i a bad girl?? NO!! i'm a very2 good girl, is it like a big fault for me for falling in love with someone, couple or fall in love with someone that not my own race?? or b'coz in that pic i was holding hands with Gary?? damn it!!, i'm just a normal person, who really want to be in love, and feel been taking care of someone, coz she never did!! she never love me, even she feed me, gave me a place to sleep, but the real is she just care baout my education!!, never care what i like or dislike..everything tht she wants me to do, i have to follow her order..!!

Gary and me..


maybe yes, i'm a bad girl, I'm really good fooling guys who is desprately want to have fun with me( ok2, i did it b'coz i dont want make the guys think that it's soo easy for them to have fun with me, i'm not tht kind of girls, and i dont like guys who cheat on his gf ).

i never do drugs, drink or sex!! not even ringan2 ok!! i never stoled anyone bf, or husband, or even the gold digger( pisau cukur )...

soo, am i still a bad girl?? answering me!! shout out at my chatbox..thanks=)